Working near Oxford I see my fair share of being a perfectionist and impostor syndrome. A psychological phenomenon in which people are unable to internalise their accomplishments. Many students feel they only got accepted into Oxford University because there was a mistake in the administration. Those students who feel this way are some of the most intelligent people I’ve ever come across. There is no evidence for their lack of achievement, they are often straight-A graders, yet it creates anxiety and depression in many, so their enjoyment of being a student wanes and their lack of self-belief means they drop out. Often this occurs in their first year, but it can persist through their degree.
Impostor syndrome more common in women
It’s not confined to the university either, someone working in one of the many science parks in the area, may worry continually about being superseded by someone smarter. It is more common among women, though I have worked with men with this condition too.
It can manifest as low confidence and self-esteem, perfectionist leanings and can be recognised in over-diligent people. They feel that they have to work ten times harder than everyone else to achieve the same recognition. Not being able to take praise at face value. One may believe that the manager is “just being nice” to them. They do not have a system to measure themselves by. An element of this may come from growing up, at home or at school. The person felt they could only measure their achievement by the approval of parents and teachers. Instead of using more objective measures such as exam results. It becomes a struggle to achieve anything as they stop applying for high positions.
The successes I have seen using solution-focused hypnotherapy shows that once you allow the person to lower their anxiety, and help build their confidence, they start to realise that their perfectionism is leading to either procrastination and no work or over work as they refuse to delegate because they are scared of losing control. Once they can put all this in perspective they often go on to achieve much more than they ever imagined.
If you’re struggling with feelings of inadequacy and low confidence, I have helped hundreds of people in similar situations. So WhatsApp me on 07508 658934 to book a consultation and find out how I can help you.